How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving Understand your own needs and boundaries: Know what you want and need from a relationship, and be able to communicate those needs clearly. Practice self-awareness: Pay attention to your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, and how they affect your relationships. Take responsibility for your own actions: Own your mistakes and learn from them. Don't blame others or make excuses. Communicate effectively: Express your thoughts and feelings in a clear and respectful way. Listen actively to your partner's perspective. * Be present and engaged: Pay attention to your partner when you're together, and make time for quality connection.